Today was a big day we had an amazing guest Tony Testa an accomplished choreographer and his friend –Damian Gomez.
Two amazing, brilliant, dancers with big hearts and ridicules groove.
Two souls that shine beyond the sky.
My girls in juvie are not an easy crew.
They also don’t give in easily.
They do not like to risk looking funny or being silly .
Samuel Becket said “Dance first think afterwards it’s the natural order.”
Well, in juvie it was think think think first .
Or question question question first.
Or be tough tough tough first, and dance later .
Not everyone would agree with Becket.
But the boys with their sweet disposition, and uncanny talent got them moving laughing, and playing. Even my two pregnant girls got into it doing the “Belly Mama dance “, putting their hand on their belly and moving to the rhythm.
There was a lot of hand holding, a lot of encouraging.
That, is a whole different dance.
I actually have been dancing all day, a work meeting in the morning,
A meeting with the incredible production company co- producing our film.
Don’t we all spend days at a time figuring out how to dance with the different people and jobs in our life? Moving forward, going back, finding the pace, and trying to be in sync?
I spent a huge part of my life dancing, once upon a time I thought I would be a professional dancer. But juvie? Juvie has challenged every step I have ever learned.
These girls whom I love like my own, keep me on my toes constantly.
Every step is important, every step must be thought about, I must be patient, patient, patient.
I must let the girls come to me.
I can not go against the current .I must swim with it, and change its course from the inside. And that? Well, that is exhausting.
I take such care, I think, I try, and I dance and dance like there is no tomorrow.
It can be discouraging because, as hard as I dance, I cannot dance for them.
It is their steps to take. And then what waits for them out side?
Well –lets just say out side there aren’t the best dancing conditions.
I look at my girls; laughing, goofing around, playing Simon says.
Learning a routine.Some come in, some go out, a few make a face.
One says I am too shy. But they all stay. They all engage.
We had a lot of people in the room with us today; I watched the defenses go up.
Only to then be broken down by the generosity of my guest dancers and the kindness and care of my film crew.
What a brilliant team I have.
The dancing ended, we sat in a circle and then there was song.
I told the girls I am proud that they stepped out of their comfort zone, because when we step out of our comfort zone that is where change starts.
Then they wanted to sing; because I guess, when you open your heart to dance, song follows.“If you sing, I will sing” one says.
“No, if I sing you will sing”
And then one just belts it out -
It is out if key, and loud, and kidda bad, and we all laugh.
So, she does it again -And then, the other one says,
“I have one”, “It’s from a Disney movie”
She sings in the most beautiful voice.
Then two others join.
And then, well then, I cry.
Plain simple, I cry, I really can’t help it.
What else can you do when beauty decides to show up like that?
“Oh my god” one comments.
“She is crying “the other one grins.
And again, we all laugh.
This was a lot to take in, I am drained.
I leave juvie and go pick up my children. To be honest I am impatient, cranky and a little snappy. There is a tantrum over something, and a whining over something else, I am a little distant .My poor children. Thursday is not a good day for them to try my patience.
“I’m going to make dinner” I say.
“Can we help?” they ask.
We put on music, and then? Well, then we dance.
I kiss my children and hold them close -
“Dance first, think afterwards, it’s the natural order.”
And that is exactly what we did.